Novena Prayers

I prepared a beautiful Novena for my mother’s wake but the priest insisted we say it after the mass and not within it. Our other priest said it’s fine to say it during the prayer of the faithful during the mass. Who is right?


Strictly speaking, the first priest was right. Why? The power of one mass is so great, is so perfect, it supercedes the words, no matter how lovely, that are in the novena prayers.

For my own brother's wake, someone kept insisting there should have been novena prayers but since we had masses in abundance, there was really no need. In fact we had the total of 10 masses. We had 9 Wake Masses and one Funeral mass. Surely, that was better than any novena prayers we could have added.

Novena prayers for the dead actually evolved because it was not always possible to offer mass for the dead. Priests were not always available. Communion was not as commonly received as it is now. With the absence of the priest, a rather lengthy set of prayers was written so one could pray for another’s soul as well as keep the congregation busy with more pious activities than merely hanging around and chatting.

Inserting novena prayers into a mass can be likened to having the most elegant dinner complete with appetizers, salads, sherbets in between, main course, second course, third course, wines, etc, and an assortment of desserts, only to insert rather ordinary peanuts in between. You may do so if you like. But must you?

And some of these novenas! Wow, some are truly medieval. What comes to mind is the one that one must reply with, “when You come to judge the world by fire.” Truly consoling. If you’re dead already.

Novenas aren’t meant to be formulaic but rather an opportunity for one’s loved ones to congregate and pray for your soul. And says the Lord, as it is written in the book of Matthew, “whenever two or more are gathered in My Name, I am there in their midst.

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Cremains at Home

I was at a friend’s house and shock of shocks, I saw that they kept the urn containing the cremated remains of their dad at their altar. We got into a rather lengthy debate with them about this. Who is right?

 

First of all, the technical term for cremated remains these days is “cremains” and interment of ashes is “inurnment.”

That aside, on to your question. I’ve seen many people do this. Strictly speaking, if one is Catholic, the teaching to this day is a proper burial of all the cremains of a person, all together, in an appropriate place of burial, which is a cemetery, a memorial park, an ossuary, crypt, or a church. They should not be scattered, whether on land or at sea. Obviously, one’s altar or mantelpiece is none of the above.

I’ve seen some people keep cremains on their altar but mostly either for only their first year of mourning or until the actual place of burial is completed. I’ve also seen some keep them for years. I have seen ashes lovingly scattered on land and on sea. I have seen nearly every possibility in my vast experience and who am I to judge when I can clearly see that they do so to lovingly honor their dead?

I know of someone who kept the cremains of her child under a large tree in her property for years. What finally convinced her to bury the urn among her relatives at the family plot elsewhere was the very insightful advice of a priest.

He said that the living should be among the living and the dead should be among the dead. Why? Well, if we do not learn to move on, how can we expect our loved one to move on? We do not want to be the cause of our loved one being unable to rest in peace. That promptly encouraged her to move on. And move on, she did.

Although her property had been in the family for years, it was no longer convenient nor practical for her to maintain, specially since the house itself was quite large and the property even more. But once she finally buried the cremains, she was inspired to sell the house and property and build her dream house in a smaller property. She was more than happy with her decision and could not imagine having done so if her child’s cremains had still been on the property.

 

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Cremation for Catholics

My family is devoutly Catholic and is totally against cremation and says the Church is against this too. Is this true?

Cremation got such a bad rap from Catholics mostly because of two moments in History:

When the early Christians were being persecuted by the Romans, not only were they killed violently but their mangled remains were also burned. This was to mock their belief in the resurrection, as burning one’s remains obliterated one’s flesh thus preventing it from rising again. This of course has been proven to be utter hogwash since we all know the power of the Almighty is way, way beyond the presence or rather lack of presence of human remains. Surely, God can resurrect the truly deserving, with or without an existing body. Don’t believe me? Just think of Joan of Arc, once burned as a heretic and now the Patron Saint of France.

Later in history, during the industrial revolution, the freemasons used cremation against the Christians for similar reasons.

Here is the teaching of the Catholic Church:

While the Church recommends that the pious custom of burying the bodies of the dead be observed, cremation is permitted as long as it had not been chosen for reasons contrary to Church teaching.

Cremated remains are to be treated with the same respect given to the remains of a human body, and should be buried or entombed. The scattering of cremated remains on the sea or on the ground, or keeping them in the home, is not the reverent final disposition that the Church requires.

Saying that cremation is evil is akin to saying that a knife is evil. It all depends on how we use it. Surely, used to kill, mangle, threaten, or destroy makes a knife seem like an evil instrument. But used to prepare food, or to heal as in surgery, the knife is actually an instrument for good. As is cremation.

In the end, it all depends on your own personal beliefs, convictions, and conscience.

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